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Monkeydogs Unite. We are always right!

November 23rd, 2010

I am a swirly, curly monkey dog!  The End.

When I do this I get a little dizzy

I do what I want

November 14th, 2010

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Sorry for taking so long to post.  I’ve been pretty busy.  Chewing underwear, unraveling throw rugs, peeing in the house.  You know how it is.  Thought I’d post some photos of myself.  I’m pretty cute.  That may sound conceited, but it is the truth and I’m a straight talker.

Anyway, I’ve been going to school for five weeks now.  Ugh.  One more lesson to go.  I learned:  sit, down, stand, shake, watch me….I’m working on come, but I don’t like that one and I’m pretty sure there will always be times when I just decide not to do it…Like when there is something more fun to do, which will be, oh yeah, ALWAYS.  Learnin’ isn’t too tough, cause I’m really smart.  I get lots of treats when I do what they tell me.

I’m learning a few things on my own, too.  When Mom and Pop aren’t paying attention to me, I grab a sock or some underwear and run through the house at top speed.  It’s a small house, so I have some quick turnarounds.  Sometimes I jump up and grab the newspaper out of their hands (really what can possibly be in there that is more interesting then me?  I know if I grab a pillow off the couch I will get some ‘tention.  When all else fails I do berserkers.  This entails running really fast, stopping on a dime with my head low and butt in the air.  Then, without warning, I hurl myself at top speed at one of them.  Man, that really stirs them up.  heh heh heh.

My mom is always lurking around on the forums.  When she is on the forum, she isn’t paying attention to me and that is just wrong!  I’m pretty ticked that I only get 23 hours of one-on-one time each day.  I mean, how many hours are there in a day, like a bizzilion, right?  You would think she could spare me more than 23.  I’m just sayin’.

Oh well, they are preoccupied with a football game right now; can’t let them get too relaxed.  I’m sensing a berserker coming on.

Oh yeah, monkey dogs, we need a place to meet.  Feel free to use my blog for information exchange.  My pawrents never read my stuff.  Like I said, I’m practically an orphan.  Harrumph.

My pawrents are slavedrivers. They make me help with the laundry. I don't even wear clothes. Sheesh.

Here I had to help Pop hook up the new TV. I hate that thing. When they are looking at it, they are not playing with me.

Me in all my perfectness

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Monkey Power!

October 18th, 2010

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Hi everybody

Well, the other day my mumma yelled, “Eureka!”….well maybe she didn’t say Eureka, but she did decide what kind of monkey, I resemble…a vervet.  Check it out:

Whaddya Think?

I’m growing up pretty fast.  I weigh 18.2 pounds!  Which means:  I GET MORE FOOD EVERY DAY!

I started school last week.  It’s really lame.  They’re trying to teach me things I already know.  Sit, Down, Stand, Watch Me.  Jeez whadda they think I am? 10 weeks old?  I am nearly 14 weeks old for pete’s sake.  By the way, who is pete anyway?

Oh yeah.  I have been going to the doctor every week.  They are looking for someone named, Annie Biotic.  Apparently, there are a number of people with this name, because they haven’t found the right Annie, yet.  I hope they find her soon.  I am getting sick and tired of the whole doctor thing.

Well, my mum has the day off and she promised to play with me.  Every dog I try to play with, doesn’t seem to want to play with me and I don’t know why.  The cranky little pug-boy that sat next to me in school was all goody-two-shoes trying to score points with the teach.  Everytime I tried to play with him, he got all snooty and wouldn’t play.  The ole apple polisher.  I know the pugapalooza would have played with me.

I wanted to post some photos of me, because I am getting cuter everyday, but my lame mumma left the stoopid computer connectors at work, so I couldn’t do it today, but I will soon!

Rock on Monkey Dogs!

I don’t understand

September 30th, 2010

First off, I just want to say, “Of course, WyattRae, you can join the resistance.”  Having someone on the inside would be excellent.  You are right.  I can see that it would be really difficult to be you following in Jerry’s pawprints.

Monkeybutt, seems like comet hardly ever lets you use the computer…She’s kinda bossy, huh?

Anyway, I haven’t been around more than twelve weeks and these new pawrents are driving me crazy.  All I ever hear is “NO.”  I can’t do anything that I want to do.  One thing I don’t understand….I’ll be playing or running around the house and drinking lots of water and all that makes me have to go, you know….go….pee, but when I do it, these crazies start yelling like the world is coming to an end and it startles me and then one of them scoops me up and takes me outside and sets me down.  WTH?  I have no idea what that is all about.  It’s like they never want me to go.  Well if that’s what they think they are going to be sorely disappointed.  I guess perfect tripawds never have to go pee.  Harumppphh.

I heard mom on the phone today talking to somebody about taking me to school…That is really going to cut in to my busy day.  I have things to do, rugs to pee on, furniture to chew; I don’t think I will have any time to go to school.  She will just have to accept that.  Did no one tell them that the world revolves around me?  It’s all about me.  ya know what I mean.  What part of “ME” do they not understand.  These two are going to be tough to train, but I’ll have them marching to my tune in short order.

I can't figure them out.

Hello world!

September 23rd, 2010

Monkeydogs are THE BEST EVER!

Hi everybody…especially Monkeybutt.  My name is Madeline; Mattie for short.  I know.  I know.  It should be spelled Maddy, but my lame mom likes “tees” better.  Ugh.  Anyway.  I should tell you right now that I am NOT a tripawd.  No offense, but I am hoping I do not become one.  My big brother was a tripawd.  I never knew him, but his name was Opie.  He was a golden retriever and the number of times that my mom has compared me to him, he was obviously  the most PERFECT dog in the world (sarcasm), because all I keep hearing Mom saying to Pop is, “Opie never chewed so much.  Why does she keep snapping at me?…Opie never did.  Opie didn’t take this long to housebreak!”  All I say is, “OPIE, OPIE, OPIE!  I am not OPIE any more than Monkeybutt is Comet.  Yeah, Comet, I know all about you.  Get ready for Monkeyface Mattie…Monkey dogs rule!

Anyway, I decided I wanted to join tripawds to try and figure out what all the hub-bub is about and to meet my big brother’s friends…..but mostly I want to infiltrate this site and expose it for what it is…a plot by tripawds to take over the world!…NO>  The UNIVERSE!

So, Monkeybutt, Dillon, Rhys, and Zuzu and any other four-leggers out there, we have to stick together.  Oh yeah.  My mom plans to talk every now and then to give advise to new tripawd pawrents…She just better keep it to the forums and other blogs because this blog is for OFFICIAL Business ONLY!  I invite all quadpawds to visit often.  I’ll talk to tripawds too, as long as they will consider joining the resistance.

PS.  Zuzu, my mom wanted me to be called Zuzu, but my pop said he didn’t want to have to go outside and yell, “ZUZU!”  That’s why my name is Mattie.  I wanted to be Gretel, but Pop said I didn’t look like a Gretel…what does a Gretel look like?  Mom says that even though my formal name is Madeline, I was nicknamed “Mattie” after some girl in some movie called True Grit.  Nice mom, let’s keep that one on the down low.  I don’t know why she would do that…probably because she is permanently scarred because her sister, Sooz, named her after a Sunday funnies’ character, Nancy, of….get this….wait for it….Nancy and Sluggo.  MMMMPWAAAAAaahahahahahahah!  There’s a couple years of therapy for ya. Way to show your age, Mom!   Good thing she wasn’t a boy cause her name would be Sluggo….PWWAAAahaah!

Sleep tight new friends for we have long days ahead of us.  Mom wants the computer to go on the forum.

Monkeyface Mattie

September 22nd, 2010